Leslie Nielsen: A Tribute

Frank Drebin, Police Squad

Every other Sunday, my Dad would take my brother and I on his Sunday morning errands. This meant a trip to the Lake Lansing Rd. Meijers. With milk, lunch meat, and other essentials in the shopping cart along with twine, a screw driver or any other home fixing gadget he needed, we would pull up to the in-store video rental section.

Like any good father, he wanted to impart his wisdom of amazing movies on his two sons. So, one week it was The Pink Panther or The Naked Gun, the next it was Police Academy or Monty Python. Like other 5- and 8-year-olds, we laughed at the classics, albeit with some complaining here and there about not being able to watch Terminator.

We finally reached the end of the list of movies my Dad wanted us to watch, but a funny thing happened the next time we were in the rental aisle: “Let’s get The Naked Gun again!” My brother and I agreed.

We laughed at the cheesy: “It's fourth and fifteen and you're looking at a full-court press.” The oddball: “Doctors say that Nordberg has a 50/50 chance of living, though there's only a 10 percent chance of that.” Even the way-over-our-heads:
“[Jane climbs a ladder]
Frank: Nice beaver!
Jane: [producing a stuffed beaver] Thank you. I just had it stuffed.”
But we loved that movie.

It didn’t stop then. As two sequels to the movie came out, we couldn’t have been more excited. The Naked Gun 2 1/2 had us peeing our pants, The Naked Gun 33 1/3 left us in side stitches (although it wasn’t as good as the first two). Frank Drebin of Police Squad was one of the funniest people I knew.

Even in high school, 16 years after the first film had been made, I loved the movie. I was one of our schools valedictorians, and while some left my classmates with words of wisdom from the likes of famous Americans, I left them with the great advice of Frank Drebin: “Like a midget at a urinal, you have to be on your toes.” (There is rumor that some in the community didn’t appreciate my speech).

Still today I go back to those movies. I have somehow convinced myself that the girls I like need to like my favorite trilogy of movies. I force them to watch it with me, and then repeat the quotes right after they play in the movie as if to reinforce how hilarious they are (looking at this now, clearly not a way to pick up the ladies…).

The Naked Gun acts as a comfort for me. If I need a laugh, I pop the DVD in, if I just got dumped by one of the girls who I made watch the movie with me, I watch it again with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s by my side. Yeah, The Naked Gun is awesome.

Leslie Nielsen was the one who played Lieutenant Frank Drebin of Police Squad. He did it so perfectly that I still chuckle as I read these quotes as the scene plays out in my mind. He passed away last night. This isn’t sad for me in the way it is sad for me when someone I know passes, but instead it reminded me that a hilarious movie can brighten a day. So, thank you Leslie Nielsen. Your acting will be missed, but your movies will not.

An Ode To Dining Halls

Thanksgiving Dinner at John Jay with CU Mid-D

I approached Weisbuch at VCP, seeing him for the first time since leaving Columbia.

Excitedly, he grinned and asked: “How’s life without John Jay, Liam?”

John Jay, being the cafeteria at Columbia, I forced myself into smile and replied in monotone: “Oh, it’s great, Buck. I’m eating really good food, and it’s easy to cook and all the food is very nice.”

He smiled even more: “Gee, I can’t wait ‘til I get to make my own food!”

I looked down at him, reached over and grabbed him by the face, “Don’t you ever say that,” I tightened my grip, his smile morphed. “Don’t you ever say that. Stay here, stay in John Jay as long as you can,” his cheeks were jiggling I was holding his face so hard. “Cherish it. For the love of God you have to cherish it.”

True story.

Well, not exactly. Mike Weisbuch, now a senior on the Columbia team and a fellow Michigander, is well aware how great he has it at John Jay and how nice it is to have a buffet of passable food prepared for you every night. Plus, he’s a lot bigger than I am, so I wouldn’t be able to “look down” at him.

But last night I was treated to the famed Thanksgiving Dinner at the John Jay Dining Hall. I joined the a group latest edition of the Columbia Mid-D crew: Matt Stewart, Dylan Isaacson, Phillip Pierott, and Mike Buck. A dinner filled with apple cider, turkey, corn bread, mashed potatoes, cookies, apple tarts, green beans, and, of course: GRAVY and STUFFING. Oh was there gravy and stuffing.

I am still full, and waking up this morning knew I had to write a special on the great dining halls that the fine institutions and universities around this great country provide. All you can eat on your Parent’s dollar, who can complain?

So, for those of you who are college students and take for granted this great eating period of your life, in the words of Billy Madison: “You have to cherish it. For the love of God you have to cherish it.”

UniWatch

Alan Weeth, Columbia UniWatch Co-Creator

January 2006, the Columbia Track and Field Team receives some fresh new duds to wear to meets. Boathouse makes the uniform, and to the team who was split between Hind and Adidas singlet’s, they are happy to have the new singlet’s and short shorts.

The next weekend, my buddy Alan Weeth and I, who were obsessed with an ESPN column called “UniWatch”, decided to do our own Columbia version of “UniWatch.” Complete with a long analysis of why in the ham sandwich would Sarah Decker be running with a hot dog in her hand?

Now, Columbia has moved on to bigger and better unis…sick right? But that doesn’t mean there can’t be a runLBP mini version of "UniWatch". Where we look at all things track and field uniforms. Just two things to point out for now…

- So what’s the deal with arm warmers? I guess they kind of make sense in terms of not wanting to wear a long sleeve under your jersey, but just put some socks on your arms! Plus, it could lead you to looking like this… But then again, you could be Ritz, and anything you wear is cool, cause he’s from Michigan. Midwest boys have style.
- The other new trend popping up is compression socks. Chris Solinsky may have broken the American 10k Record in them, but if he thinks he looks as cool as Bill and Wilt he’s got another thing coming. If he pulls the Kerry Kittles, he may be onto something. Meanwhile, Columbia runner Tom Poland may have just qualified for NCAAs in XC (a big congrats to the first guy to do so in over 5 years!), he has quite the style going…

Times change, and soon enough, there will be a new compression sock or arm warmer out there…and I’ll probably be all over it. The original Columbia UniWatch is currently being searched for, but Alan Weeth is too busy making clothes for Ambercrombie and I am too busy worrying what my new uniform will look like (I’m thinking Empire State Buildings all over it). Until then, don’t wear anything that foolish, kids who wear headbands are losers.

New Post

Look for a new one tomorrow morning...working on it this evening, it's going to be a very interactive one (meaning lots of links).

The Bet

The 10K-Dub-L: Dan Nunn

I made a bet with Dan Nunn six months ago. There is some serious money going to the winner ($250, or 1000 chicken nuggs) and a long time period to decide who said winner is (4 years). But before I get to what the bet is, a brief history of Dan Nunn and I is necessary…

(And by brief, I mean long, but enjoy.)

Dan Nunn did not want me to go to Georgetown. I visited Gtown in December of 2007, and I did not make a great impression on the PAJC (Dan Nunn is a man of many nicknames: His freshman year, he was the Pan-Am Junior Champ in the 10k – “PAJC”. His 5th-year, he ran a 28:24 to win the Stanford 10k and was the World Leader for a week – “10-K-Dub-L”. When I was there, he ate a lot of Bacon – “Bacon”. And then he was weird and twitter-named himself “La-La” (perhaps he likes the old mtv v-j)). But I digress, because D-Nunn (there’s another) did not like that I was joining the team.

According to him: “Liam came in when I was watching a movie, it was Anne Hathaway’s great film The Princess Diaries 2, I believe, and he just would not stop talking! I told him to quiet down so I could enjoy the wonderful acting of Julie Andrews, but he just wouldn’t shut up. So I figured he was just a talker.

“So then, a bunch of people are over on his last night here and they’re watching The Shining, and I ask a question. Liam shushes me. The guy has the nerve to do that. He tells me to quiet down so he can watch a movie. Can you believe it? So yeah, that’s why I didn’t like Liam and didn’t want him on my team. He was an asshole.”

Whoah, whoah, whoah, Dan…an asshole? Isn’t that a little strong on choice of a word?

“Nope, I meant it.”

The problem for Dan was that I was going to be his roommate. So we were going to spend way more time together than he would have liked.

You always view yourself as a littler cooler than you actually are, but I think I did a fairly good job of being cool at Georgetown my first semester there. Overall, I was pretty liked by most guys on the team. As right or wrong as it is, I was doing well in workouts, so respect was there, and I tried not to step on any toes, so most of the guys were at least alright with me.

Dan took a little more work. We would start to bond over him cooking bacon when I would get home from class around 10pm. We would talk about girls and how Dan wanted to weigh 300 pounds at least once in his life but I could tell something about me still irked him. Then, a movie brought us together for good.

There was a party during the offseason that the whole team was at. It was right next door to our house, which was great for us. We both took the 10 foot walk home at separate times but found ourselves in our living room as Zoolander blared on TBS at 2am. But we didn’t even really watch the movie. Instead, we talked.

And a mutual respect was born. Talking during movies could make Dan hate me, but in a twist of fate, it also made him my friend.

From there, we were cool. We did workouts together…if he ran a 400 in 55, I would run it in 54.9 (granted he beat me by 8 seconds on the 1200 leg of the ladder). We hung out…we were roommates at NCAAs in Fayetteville. And we even met up when I was in the Bay Area last year, where Dan is now that he’s done with Georgetown.

So there you have it: Dan Nunn and I from the start.

And now, to the bet. Dan stopped running competitively last fall. He is in school in the Bay Area to become a 2nd Grade Teacher, but I was able to see him last May for the Payton-Jordan Invite at Stanford.

At dinner, the conversation turned to one we used to often have:

“Dude, I am going to get up to 300 pounds at some point in my life,” Dan said to a group of us at dinner.

“No way in hell,” I called him out. “How much do you weigh right now?”

“I was 160 at the doctor’s office, but I had a bunch of stuff in my pockets.” He laughed. “But, dude, I’ll get up to 300.”

“Guaranteed you wont. I’ll bet you anything that you don’t.”

“Fine, 250 bucks.”

“Deal.” And we shook hands.

Dan and I have a $250 bet as to whether or not he will ever top 300 pounds. I couldn’t give him his entire life, because at that point $250 wont be anything. But I gave him four years, and he accepted. So by May 5th, 2014, if Dan Nunn hasn’t weighed in at 300 lbs or more, he will owe me the money. If any time before then he does, I will owe him 1000 chicken nuggs because he will need them to sustain his diet.

D-Nunn and I at some banquet...Classy.

**UPDATE** Dan Nunn is reportedly training for a marathon. Things are looking good on my end.

REEEESE'S & Costumes

Halloween has come and gone, and I am five pounds heavier due to the influx of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups that took over my diet. Jokes, jokes. But I did eat a ton of Reese’s a la Walt Pett every October. Aside from the candy, I’m not necessarily the hugest Halloween fan (luckily, candy plays a huge role, so I really like Halloween).

Dressing up isn’t my favorite thing, but I play the part if need be. A favorite costume for the children of Walter Pett was Bee Keeper and the white jump suit and mask you had to wear with it. It was easy enough, even if the suit for a 6 foot 2 inch man was a bit big for us. This year I was Zorro, and the drawn on mustache was legit.

While there are thousands of costumes out there, in the realm of running related costumes, there are only a few to consider. Halloween always falls around the Conference Championships for College XC teams, so here are some things for the college runner to consider for their after conference Halloween get-together:

1 – Be Usain Bolt. Get the arms. Get the outfit. Strike the pose. It is an easy and awesome costume. My brother Will pulled it off even if it was only because we had no other costume options.

2 – Dress up as one of your coaches. It will always get a few laughs amongst your teammates. But don’t wear it to a non-track event, then it won’t make much sense at all.

3 – Be an awesome runner that you know. My buddy Jonah pulled it off perfectly:

I knew I had made it when someone portrayed me for Halloween. Too bad I couldn’t make this list for you all before Halloween…